Conformity/Identity

7 Strange Things About Conformity/Identities

How much time do we spend worrying about our image? Some more than other others, but even the most laid back guy at least throws himself a glance when heading out the door. We are all cultivating identities, constantly shaping and modifying the image we want others to see. As good Christians we all know 1 Samuel 16:7 but still communicate things to others with the way we present ourselves. For example, workout clothes say "I'm going to the gym", a suit says "I respect myself and my work", and a Maroon 5 t-shirt says "I have bad taste". Whether we admit it or not, everyone wants to think of themselves as cool, ahead of the curve, and generally more aware than the other "sheep" who blindly follow trends. That's great you were listening to Sufjan and wearing plaid shirts long before he/they were mainstream; so was everyone else at Fuller. But sometimes there are aspects of conformity that we don't want to think about, like the fact that...

1) Cool is an illusion.
 A cultural construct of what is desirable. We are all cultivating an image based on what we see in the media and in others. Whether it is hipster, outdoorsy, preppy, trendy, etc., we are subconsciously aiming for something we have already seen. And the truth is we are all just dorks. Whether its video games, clothes, harry potter, Dane Cook, shopping, reality t.v., star wars, a snort in our laugh, etc., we have some guilty pleasure that is hidden most of the time. You have, at some point, farted at an inopportune moment, tripped while walking up stairs, gotten caught in a nose pick, been laughed at by someone you dislike, and worn something you were later ashamed of, but its ok because so has EVERYONE ELSE. On a side note, my sister started something fun in high school-whenever we tripped in public, we figured the Lord was trying to humble us, so we would just put our hands in the air and scream "humility!"

2) Anti-conformity is still controlled by trends.
 Once a trend becomes mainstream, most of us kiss it goodbye. But why? Just because more people are enjoying it? I used to like the clothing brand RVCA, and my friend worked at a surf shop so the gear I got was not available to the public which meant I felt double awesome. Then one day the wifey and I were babysitting kids and watching the Disney channel and some little 13 year old kid in the show is wearing my RVCA shirt. The exact one was wearing at that moment. I felt dirty. Like a cheap whore. I promptly went home and fed my RVCA clothes to some goats. How many of us have enjoyed a band when they were indie and become disinterested when they make it big time?  In an attempt to NOT be trendy we still let trends dictate our taste. Plus, you end up looking just like the other non-conformists you hang out with. Ever see two guys with cutoff pants, v-neck tees, and toms standing next to each other? Hilarious.

3) Newsie caps need to stop.
     This has nothing to do with conformity, it just annoys me. Unless you are herding sheep in Scotland or delivering papers in the 1920’s, there is no reason to wear these things. If you must wear them at least wear clothes that match, like a collared shirt or blazer. Newsie cap + hooded sweatshirt = foolish. The exception here is if you’re black, in which case you can pull off any hat. Now that I think about it, perhaps this rule could be abbreviated to white dudes should avoid hats.

4) Conformity affects language.
    I understand that humans have a need to belong to a group and common language is a way of bonding, but if I hear one more person use the word “literally” incorrectly I will probably start crying. When did this start? How can it end? There are many phrases or words that currently get overused (“I’m not gonna lie…”, “I feel like…”,”fail”, “creeper”, ”legit”) but “literally” is so abused someone needs to notify police. Why can’t we let our yes be yes and our no be no? Last week I was out with my wife and her friends for a few drinks, and I noticed they were saying “literally” about two or three times per sentence. Eventually I said “Hey let’s play a game: every time you use the word “literally” incorrectly, you have to buy me another piece of sushi.” Everyone just looked at me. My wife whispered “Matt, no, don’t be mean…” Blank stares. Conversation resumed and within two minutes I was once again hearing things like “I was literally like so hungry today” and “That test was like, literally, like, such a hard test.”  I wasn’t even drinking that night but I blacked out from anger.

5) People are self-obsessed and probably won’t notice that you are wearing your nice jeans today.
    Sorry.

6) Even grooming habits change over time.
    Take facial hair for example. Sideburns were sweet in the 70’s, the ‘stache was supreme in the 80’s, and anything that accented your mullet was acceptable in the 90’s. But what about now? Ladies, say you are interested in a guy but don’t know if he’s single. What to do?? Fortunately I have compiled a chart to save you time and heartache:

7) Wow that MS Paint chart I made is bad.   
    Really you should disregard everything I have said in this article. Wear whatever makes you happy and if it is stupid then (hopefully) your friends will call you out.