Gray Days

     Ever since I was a kid my dad has told me to put on a lot of sunscreen.  "You don't want to have leathery old-man skin at age 30 do you??"  So many years of being in the sun...  Well, I'm 30 now, and I just went to the dermatologist.  I was actually pretty amazed that he only had to cut off one mole from my back, but now I play the waiting game.  In a week I call to find out if I have melanoma. 

      Sometimes the weather matches your mood.  It's been drizzly here in Pasadena for a few days, so that added a bit more melancholy to my morning, but not enough.  Listening to Iron & Wine while walking home in the rain from the doctor who might tell you that you have cancerous spots, now THAT is melancholy.  I don't really mind though.  We cant always live on the mountaintop with the Lord.  Sometimes we just have to trust in Him as we shuffle through the valleys.

     On a side note, it's always humbling to hear "Go into that room and take all your clothes off."  All I could think of was Jerry Seinfeld's bit about doctors making you wait on that crunchy deli paper.

My Dad

...is a Godly, wise man.  This picture is me, little bro (chase), and dad at chase's college graduation.  In emailing my dad back and forth recently, one email said simply this: "The Lord is such a gentleman – He loves us too much to give up on us but also loves us too much to bang in the door.  He just keeps knocking. "

    How consistent and loving is God?  Our brains can't even fathom it.  He is before time.  He CREATED time. WHAT?!?  In an effort to find a home church out here we have been trying many different ones, but at each one God continues to show up.  Especially in the worship.  It melts my heart (in a good way) that worship songs I spent years listening to alone in my car, playing alone at home, singing along with all by myself-these are the songs I finally get to sing with the body of Christ!!  I feel welcomed home again, and like I am in new territory, both at the same time. 

   For me it has recently been music.  What are some of the ways God has been gently knocking on your heart recently?  If you listen, He is.

Shhhh

     Our world is filled with noise.  We have grown so accustomed to the constant sound of cell phones, radios, traffic, televisions, conversations, iPods, etc. (and usually more than one at a time) that it is actually uncomfortable to be in silence for more than a few moments.  What happens in a conversation when a few seconds pass without someone speaking?   We call it an "awkward" or "uncomfortable" silence.  We are vaguely aware of scripture's emphasis on the value of quiet before God ("Be still and know what I am God..." Psalm 46:10; "Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed..." Luke 5:16), but how often do we actually practice it?  I never would have attempted it on my own, but in my first year as a youth pastor my boss decided to mandate a "hang-out-with-Jesus day".  We were to go to a place that was special to us (I chose the beach) with a notebook and bible, leave our cell phone in the car, and spend at least a couple hours in the quiet, holy presence of God.  It was incredible.  I had never spend so long in silence before God.  The answers he spoke into my heart, the joy and peace I felt in His presence-it was the most spiritually fruitful day of my life.  I have since replicated this time of silence with varying degrees of success, but I have come to realize the discipline of silence doesnt require a whole day of solitude.  Those are nice when we can afford them, but the discipline of silence seems to be simply this: being quiet before God when there would otherwise be noise.  It could be driving to work with the radio off, sitting alone in a park, or spending 10 minutes before your devotional on your knees.  Regardless of exactly how we practice silence, when we turn the volume down on the noise in our lives, we hear God's voice with much greater clarity!