answer the question or question the answers?

So instead of blogging, my free time for the past month or so has been spent recording a Christmas album. It can be found here.

One of the perks of attending a seminary that specializes in the Arts is going to free movie screenings. Tonight we went to a nice theater to see "The Adjustment Bureau" starring Matt Damon and Emily Blunt. Here is the trailer. It raises questions of free will vs. fate, choice vs. chance, and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

Last week a professor said something very interesting-years ago, while listening to a lecture, the speaker said "It is your task as a pastor to guard the great questions."

I find this fascinating. You must admit, often the church appears to have all the answers and if you are struggling with questions or doubts (which we all do if we are honest) then you must be a bad Christian. But this idea of guarding great questions is intriguing. What might those questions be? Who is God? What are the characteristics of God? Why am I here? What does Jesus' life, ministry, and death mean for me today? Why are we as Christians afraid to wrestle with issues? If we believe all truth is God's truth, won't our struggles, investigations, and prayers just lead us closer to God?

Gray Days

     Ever since I was a kid my dad has told me to put on a lot of sunscreen.  "You don't want to have leathery old-man skin at age 30 do you??"  So many years of being in the sun...  Well, I'm 30 now, and I just went to the dermatologist.  I was actually pretty amazed that he only had to cut off one mole from my back, but now I play the waiting game.  In a week I call to find out if I have melanoma. 

      Sometimes the weather matches your mood.  It's been drizzly here in Pasadena for a few days, so that added a bit more melancholy to my morning, but not enough.  Listening to Iron & Wine while walking home in the rain from the doctor who might tell you that you have cancerous spots, now THAT is melancholy.  I don't really mind though.  We cant always live on the mountaintop with the Lord.  Sometimes we just have to trust in Him as we shuffle through the valleys.

     On a side note, it's always humbling to hear "Go into that room and take all your clothes off."  All I could think of was Jerry Seinfeld's bit about doctors making you wait on that crunchy deli paper.

My Dad

...is a Godly, wise man.  This picture is me, little bro (chase), and dad at chase's college graduation.  In emailing my dad back and forth recently, one email said simply this: "The Lord is such a gentleman – He loves us too much to give up on us but also loves us too much to bang in the door.  He just keeps knocking. "

    How consistent and loving is God?  Our brains can't even fathom it.  He is before time.  He CREATED time. WHAT?!?  In an effort to find a home church out here we have been trying many different ones, but at each one God continues to show up.  Especially in the worship.  It melts my heart (in a good way) that worship songs I spent years listening to alone in my car, playing alone at home, singing along with all by myself-these are the songs I finally get to sing with the body of Christ!!  I feel welcomed home again, and like I am in new territory, both at the same time. 

   For me it has recently been music.  What are some of the ways God has been gently knocking on your heart recently?  If you listen, He is.

Shhhh

     Our world is filled with noise.  We have grown so accustomed to the constant sound of cell phones, radios, traffic, televisions, conversations, iPods, etc. (and usually more than one at a time) that it is actually uncomfortable to be in silence for more than a few moments.  What happens in a conversation when a few seconds pass without someone speaking?   We call it an "awkward" or "uncomfortable" silence.  We are vaguely aware of scripture's emphasis on the value of quiet before God ("Be still and know what I am God..." Psalm 46:10; "Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed..." Luke 5:16), but how often do we actually practice it?  I never would have attempted it on my own, but in my first year as a youth pastor my boss decided to mandate a "hang-out-with-Jesus day".  We were to go to a place that was special to us (I chose the beach) with a notebook and bible, leave our cell phone in the car, and spend at least a couple hours in the quiet, holy presence of God.  It was incredible.  I had never spend so long in silence before God.  The answers he spoke into my heart, the joy and peace I felt in His presence-it was the most spiritually fruitful day of my life.  I have since replicated this time of silence with varying degrees of success, but I have come to realize the discipline of silence doesnt require a whole day of solitude.  Those are nice when we can afford them, but the discipline of silence seems to be simply this: being quiet before God when there would otherwise be noise.  It could be driving to work with the radio off, sitting alone in a park, or spending 10 minutes before your devotional on your knees.  Regardless of exactly how we practice silence, when we turn the volume down on the noise in our lives, we hear God's voice with much greater clarity! 

The Tension and the Terror

     It is every man’s worst nightmare: you’re on a date with a girl, things are going well, you lean in for a goodnight kiss….and she turns her head at the last minute.  You have an awkward cheek-kiss-side-hug, say goodnight, and limp home.  My own wife did this to me.  Of course she wasn’t my wife at the time; we still still dating.  She now claims innocence but I know she was deliberately playing hard to get.  Spoiler alert!  I did eventually kiss her.  But most of us have experienced the tension of a moment like that.  A band I used to listen to has a song called “The Tension and the Terror”, and the lyrics of the chorus really capture the excited, fearful anticipation such moments:

And I try but I'm not convincing

Your lips, they pout and twist

And I die trying just to keep myself from kissing you
You take in everything with
a certainty I envy
It's somehow all I need

Just keep me guessing please


The writer of the song dreads, yet longs for, this uncertain moment.  He both identifies AND juxtaposes the tension with terror.  This tension is scary… and beautiful!

     Whether you are in school or working, single or married, young or old, you will experience tension in your life on a regular basis.  Tension occurs when our perceptions or expectations are challenged.  It is a pulling back and forth of our own experiences and expectations with that of others'.  It can be, and usually is, quite uncomfortable.  When you find yourself scared (or even terrified) of the tension this season,  remember that is when you grow.  Girls know that trimming your hair makes your hair healthier.  Guys know that lifting weights and breaking your muscles down makes you stronger.  Less masculine guys know that playing video games on a harder level increases your skills.  And so we as Christians grow in Christ, and with each other, when we are challenged and force to wrestle with ideas and situations beyond our grasp.  Just like Jacob wrestled with an angel in Genesis 32, sometimes all we have to do is hang on and God will bless us.  We need that tension!

Holly Good

Due to my father-in-law's awesome job and business relationships, the wifey and I got to go to a mega-swanky fundraiser for Operation Smile this weekend.  It was at the Beverly Hills Hilton, presented awards to various celebrities for their efforts, raised millions of dollars, and was overall a very lovely event.

The whole family was starstruck to varying degrees all night, but at some point it hit me that this was Hollywood using its power/fame/resources for a good cause!  I know whenever an award show is on T.V. I just flip past it and roll my eyes.  Celebrities are just soulless, out-of-touch with reality money-grubbers who lucked out into a profession where they get overpaid to act like someone else, right?  Maybe some of them.  But that night we witnessed evidence that there are those with wealth and power who give back, both with time and treasure, and give generously.  These acts are very rarely publicized.  It is very encouraging to know that even in a place like Los Angeles, where there are so many lost and lonely, God is working in very cool ways.  He is working to bring about His kingdom in ways we will never imagine.

Diverse City

      My job as an MSA (media support associate-we do audio and video for events) means I will sometimes get to experience (albeit behind a camera) interesting events most students do not.  Last night we shot about four hours of discussion hosted by Dr. Mouw (president of Fuller) and Andy Crouch (author of Culture Making).   Participating in the discussion were dozens of pastors and leaders from Latino, African-American, Asian, and Caucasian churches and organizations.  The topics ranged from what God is doing in local congregations to what Fuller seminary should/could be, and any combination thereof.  Two things stuck out to me as I walked home:

    First, what an encouragement to know that we serve the same God as our brothers and sisters in Africa, South America, Asia and the rest of the world.  Our God is bigger than our home church, parents' house, sunday school classroom, or wherever we first learned about Him.  I think sometimes we have a tendency to think of God in selfish terms-how is God working in MY life?  What is He trying to say to ME?  While those are certainly important concepts to wrestle with for any Christian, it is quite refreshing to be reminded that it is NOT just all about US as individuals.  God is at work all over this fragile earth, our island home!

     Second, I now have an important addition to the old cliche, "Don't put God in a box."  My buddies and I would joke around with that phrase as a catch-all in undergrad.  It really is humorous and semi-applicable in all situations.  Go ahead and try it.
 "Can I have a bite of your sandwich?" "Don't put God in a box."
 "I have to go to the bathroom." "Don't put God in a box, bro."

     The assumption with this phrase is that we needed to be reminded that God is GOD, and can do anything beyond what our unimaginative minds can fathom.  But last night I heard someone add a great qualifier to that phrase - God works through us in OUR box.  We are not infinite.  We, as Christians in the world, cannot be everything to all people, nor should we.  Though we may look, sound, or act different, we are united in the most beautiful and important way possible-Jesus!  We truly are the body of Christ- I'm a kneecap, you're a bicep, and we each can accomplish what the other cannot.  God has given all of us a specific skill set and personality that is intended to reach a unique part of creation for His glory.

    Let us go forth knowing we can do things for the kingdom of God that nobody else can!

A New Season

This is the blog for Matthew Pittman.  I have avoided blogging for a long time but now find myself at a stage in life where it might benefit me to articulate some thoughts from time to time.  My wife and I just moved to Pasadena where she is in PA school at USC and I am studying at Fuller Seminary.  

For years I let myself be distracted by the fleeting, trivial junk that this world has to offer; I am finally trying to tune all of that nonsense out and hear with greater clarity the voice of the One who created me, that I might do what He created me to do....